Greeting the Good When It's Hard To
Miriam Lowe
Sunday, January 22nd
2022 was easily the best year of my life, also simultaneously the worst. Funny how the two coincide so seamlessly.
I’m an optimist and have always found joy in looking for the good in my circumstances. Last year, however, was simply a slap in the face. I entered 2022 in a serious relationship, having just received my dream role in Little Women, my school’s musical production, with a local pageant title headed to the state scholarship competition, with a school mentorship organization that I was trying to build, a solid friend group, etc. The world was mine. I felt as if I could die fully contented at this point.
I can’t even begin to express how “on top of the world” I felt. On the closing night of my school’s show, I experienced happiness, adrenaline, and gratitude like I never had before. I was also spending countless hours in interview prep for Miss Oklahoma’s Outstanding Teen, developing my opinions and refining myself. Sure, I was busy, but things were good, really good.
And then came July (the slap in the face month).
Somehow, and the details are far too blurry to decipher, I was getting ready to enter my senior year, supposedly the best year of my life, heartbroken from a relationship, dealing with crippling anxiety, not accepted into my school's 12th grade leadership class, and in a really, really dark place. The darkest place I’ve ever been. I switched so quickly from being in control of everything in my life to just being sad. That happiness and gratitude that I felt so passionately only a few short months ago was suddenly nonexistent. There was no greeting the good at a time like this. I felt not myself for a long time. What good was there? I accepted that I wasn’t ok, but I wanted to find a way to not be defined by what I was facing.
Naturally, however, as most things do in life, it got better slowly, VERY SLWOLY. I’m still struggling with some of those things now. I’m a mess of human being a lot of the time, but I’m not defined by what is difficult in my life. In fact, I’ve learned something. When life sucks, there is always good to hold onto. When I didn’t feel like getting out of bed in the morning, I would grasp onto any flicker of joy that I could find whether it was a compliment from a friend, a coffee my mom brought me, or a short walk. That sounds incredibly dramatic, but it got and has been getting me through.
Though those first few months of the semester were extremely challenging, and I’m sure I have even more challenging times headed my way, I have good family, good friends, a good God, and a good mindset that will keep me going. I accepted that I was not ok, but I found a good moment and held on tight.
In 2023, I plan to do a lot of greeting the good. Life just hurts sometimes and there’s no way to avoid it, so face it head on, greet, and savor those good moments.
Here are some things I think might help you in 2023 if you’re trying to greet the good when things are hard:
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- Actively let go of control (it’s not yours in the first place).
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- Set a daily goal for yourself. Maybe it’s doing laundry, reading for 10 minutes, or going on a walk. Just find something small to achieve.
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- Ask someone to check in on you. Read that again.
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- Roll your windows down, even if it's cold.
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- Write down your thoughts. Always end with positive affirmation.
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- Drive to sonic, get your favorite drink, sit in the parking lot, and watch your favorite YouTuber for 30 minutes.
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- Don’t set unrealistic expectations.
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- Appreciate yourself.
xoxo, Miri
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